Ok..Ok.. Im back!

Obviously not as much as before #3 made his arrival, but ive got shocking Blogspot withdrawals and so im attempting a come back..

Gees! What to talk about, the only things that are swimming through my head are - Breastfeeding, Poo-ey nappies (well the lack of), weight gains (From number #3, not me.. thank goodness) and Nightmares... So ill start with breast feeding.

BFing lasted about 2-4 weeks with Master 4.9 and Miss .17 , With 4.9 i didnt even query the midwives when i walked in to find them bottle feeding him in special care. He was jaundice and under the lights for 24 hours on Day 5 and they thought they would 'let me sleep a little' and insted of waking me for his feed, they formula fed him 110ml. The outcome of that, We found out he was lactose intolerant.

I didnt have Internet access back then, and being 20 and pregnant i was the only one out of my close group of friends to be starting a family young. So i didnt have a very good support network. I had no expectations on labour, birthing or feeding. But when i found out i was expecting .17 , 3 years later.. i researched everything and anything!

My birth with 4.9 was wonderful, yet daunting. I laboured on my own as they sent my family home telling them i was hours off giving birth and i didnt think pain relief was an option untill your waters had broken.

When my waters did brake the midwife casually said to me "I suppose you had better make the call to the father and let him know he should come on in when hes up and showered, mind you this could go on for hours" .. 22 minutes later i was holding my new born son. I attempted putting him to the breast which he took to nicely, but not for long. I was so zoned out and in shock, it didnt bother me. an hour later I walked back to maternity and was left there alone for 6 hours. Not one doctor of midwife came to see how we were going, so i just layed there alone with my new born attached to my breast. Thats the biggest memory i have of that day.

At 4pm my parents and his dad came back up to see us. Followed closely by a handful of friends, our next door neighbours, who was also a nurse at the hospital, Master 4.5's great grand parents and work friends. This was the first time i had seen any doctor of midwife, when they came in to say everyone had to leave. I was so overwhelmed with the amount of people, but still had this new baby attached to my breast. Everyone left bar my parents and his dad. I asked mum when someone would be in to check on me, she asked if i had seen anyone and i said no. When i took 4.9 off my breast my nipples were cracked and bleeding heavily. I was in agony. When i eventually spoke with the mid wife in duty, she told me cracked nipples were something i would 'have to get used to' and to lay on my side and feed him if i get to tired. I felt as tho he was sucking and sucking and nothing was coming out. My nipples were dry, cracked and bleeding and his lips were so dry i could see the corners of his mouth building up crust. But everyone said it was 'normal'

Day 4 i woke up and noticed his eyes weren't as white as they were the night before and when i mentioned it to the nurse she snapped back with "You should have told us this earlier! Not day4!" and whisked him away to Special Care where the pricked his heal and tested his jaundace levels. His levels were 220 and he spent the next 24 hours in phototherapy. This is when the formula feeding occurred.

Who knows, maby it was a godsent that the did formula feed him, because if i had him latched on for one more hour i would have de-dripped myself and ran from the hospital. But if they had just worked with me in expressing and latching, then he wouldnt have had issues with the lactose. Thats all something ive had to put far behind me.

On finding out i was expecting Miss .17 i starting pregnancy and breastfeeding vitamins, ate very very well and stayed away from caffeine's, chocolates and ate very little takeaway. In hope that i would successfully breast feed her. She didnt want a bar of the breast from the second i had her. She wouldnt latch on and at 10lbs 1oz i thought she would be starving!

When the tested her blood sugar levels they told me i would have to make sure she fed every 2 hours to get the levels up. They were 2.8 and they wanted them above 3. I had a great amount of colostrum, it flowed out, but she just wouldnt latch on. We were released a day later, with her still not feeding, only to be back 5 days later. She had lost nearly 1kg and had screamed herself horse. The poor thing was starving herself. After over a week of pumping and bottle feeding her EBM, my milk supply wasnt enough to cover feeds, Her wonderful Paediatrician then used Elecare, a hypoallergenic formula to top her up. I also had full access to lactation consultants and councillors, which helped me under stand what was going on.

Up untill she was about 12 months old her weight gain was slow and sometimes non existent. on a good week she would put on 20g-50g on a bad week she might lose 5g-10g. But once she started those solids... She boomed!

At my first antenatal appointment with #3 i mentioned to the midwife all of the troubles ive had with the last 2, she put me in touch with the lactation consultant at the hospital. At my next appointment i met with her and could have sat there for hours and hours probing her for information! She was amazing. She then worked with me , one on one right up untill i left hospital and i still talk with her every week. I mentioned to her i didnt feel like i had enough skin on skin time with Miss .17, and that i felt rushed to get her to feed. We wrote out a 'Game plan' (Flexible birthing plan) So this time things would go home i wanted it. Birthing wise, i wasnt phased, Id had 2 wonderful fast labours before and if by some chance i needed a Cesarean, it didnt bother me. It was the after care i worried about. So we stated i would like a whole hour skin to skin time, Unless medical reasons forbid it to happen. I would like for bubby to latch on it its own time. I didnt want the midwives shoving my breast down its throat. And i wanted for my lactation consultant to be notified that id had bubs, so she could come straight up. All of those requests were met. Mr 26 phoned her as soon as i was back in my room and she came up about an hour later. All in all, The 3rd experience was wonderful. Im feeding him from both breast and then topping him up with Neocate, which is very very similar to Elecare. Im on motilium to increase my supply, which im thinking of changing to Maxalon as ive heard its better. I pump after feeding as i feel hes not stimulating my breasts enough to make a great supply. Im adamant im going to stick it out. I know in a few weeks when hes more alert hes going to become a better feeder and i want to be able to do my best for as long as i can.

#3 Pooped every single feed without fail, untill about a week ago. He went 3 days without pooping and we could tell he was in a LOT of pain. I asked the health nurse what we could use and she suggested infant suppositories and coloyxl. We gave him a suppository after his bath and within 5 minutes he had fill 2 nappies! He then went another 2 days so my mum gave him another while he was with her and he filled 3 nappies. Talk about backup! Tomorrow ere going to buy some coloxyl drops as i feel like im violating him! *Sad face* .. A bit of useless info.. Brown sugar and water.. big No No. All it does it irritate the bowl, and if bubs is constipated its just going to put them in more pain. Coloxly drops coat the stool which helps it come out easier.

I dont know if its the lack of sleep, but last night i had such a 'real' dream.. i wouldnt say it was a 'nightmare'.. more of a dream that made me sad. But the thing that scared me the most, is that it was just so real! It was set in my home, and my loungeroom was exactly the same, everything was in its place and i was walking out to get #3 a top up, where everything was where i have it now.. Bizarre. Ive also been clenching my teeth at night which has given me a shocking tooth ache. I cant have anything cold to eat or drink without a horrible pain ripping through my mouth for hours. Dreaded dentist time i think!

Anyways, its good to be back, its taken me 5 and a half hours on and off to complete this, but i feel SO much better getting it all out. Ive never expressed how i felt about my previous labours before, and i feel a lot less stressed about it now.

Better go feed the not so little guy!

x N