Torn.

Torn, and i don't know what to do!

(35 minutes after i wrote that... I'm now 99% sure, i think i know what i want to do)

Ive finally found my mojo! My love for sewing crafty goods. But Ive lost my drive for competing in the WAHMother of the year award feud.

About 2 years ago when i started out with a certain little business, there were next to no Work at home mums / parents on facebook. I had not one single fan page on my profile of another person selling or making things from home. Now, there are thousands!

I want to set my self apart from them. I hate the way they fight, i love when i see someone succeed only to hate it when another scoops up the idea and runs with it. Im out spoken. I cant hide behind this 'Happy little business' venture. I sew what i sew because it beats my depression. I create to take me to my happy place and i blog because its my release.

So im thinking of combining the 2. Blogging for the love of venting and connecting with others like me. And offering my handmade goods to those who are interested.

Ive not once come across a parent who combines there LIFE, there actual every day, with there business. I would love to spend just one day in the shoes of creative minds i look up to.

Are they really as happy and successful as there 'Fan' page says?

It funny when i come across fan pages that are chirpy, up beat and impressive. Yet to see a personal page status update no more then a minute later about how miserable there life is. I cant for a second longer pretend to be a facebook work at home parent business woman. Its just not me. The reason i dont update my status on my page that often is i would cringe at writing how blissful my day is, yet im sitting in my Pj's with a scorching headache from 3 kids tormenting me for fun! LOL

So, here is where im torn. My blog is open. I can guarentee there are a ton of people on here who possibly judge or laugh. But i know there are people who find relief and comfort in knowing , They arent the only one.

So, do i stop this whole business venture idea on facebook and simply invite others to share in my life, ups, downs and sideways. And give them the opportunity to have something ive created through here. Or do i keep pushing what i hate! And run a 'business' through a website.. My heart is telling me to stop.

Yet, still i don't know why i feel the need for approval! For someone to turn around and say 'Nope, terrible idea!' Or ' Go for it.. i think that's a great idea'.

I guess that's where my insecurities step in.

How does one take a stance and say "This is how its going to be!" ??? Is it possible?

Meh... Im so torn!